So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I supernannyed him into submission
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
