That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize