I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
