she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
