he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
