Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
the raccoons are back...
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
