So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
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