Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
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