Redeem this text for a blowjob
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize