ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
