Have you finally orgasmed yet?
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
