She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
