it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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