OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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