So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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