i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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