You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
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