it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I touched a dick in church today
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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