So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Randomize
