absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
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