if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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