someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
