tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
