Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Houston, we have a blender
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
