Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize