sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
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