i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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