I accidentally had phone sex last night
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Who died my cat blue again?
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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