You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize