it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
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He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
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Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
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