So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I have fence marks all over my body
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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