Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
