just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
