Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Just high enough for therapy.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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