Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
