why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Randomize
