I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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