If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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