that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
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Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
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At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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