do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize