"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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