you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
