Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Randomize
