I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
You know, be my cock's hype man.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
My bed smells like the plague
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