I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
