Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
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Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
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I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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