What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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