My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
