Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Randomize
