sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Randomize
