was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I have tasted many bathrooms
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
